Purely to save your own sanity, to give yourself the space to follow your passions and dreams, to make yourself a priority in your own life.
It can also be one of the hardest statements to make. We feel that we owe them an explanation, that somehow we are letting them down.
What we fail to realize is that by saying "yes" we are letting ourselves down. We are taking on more than we can comfortably manage. we are pushing ourselves to the limit and beating ourselves up for not doing a better job.
The reality is that we are doing a bad job because we took on too much, we stretched ourselves too thin because we couldn't say "no". We thought they would think badly of us, that they would think we were selfish. We worried that they wouldn't like us and maybe they won't, for a while.
The reality is none of that has anything to do with us.
What we have to take responsibility for is what we agree to do and where we want to spend our time. Because let's face it our time is precious - every minute that we spend doing something we don't want to is a minute of our lives we won't get back.
Need some clarity?Then ask yourself these questions:
What makes your heart sing?:
We all have that one thing that we could do all day and at the end of it we would wonder where the time has gone. This is our passion, our dream, our everything. And it looks like different things to different people, you just know while you are doing it that you feel alive, complete and happy.
Do more of that.
Where does your mind go when it wanders?
Chances are your mind wanders back to your goals and dreams - your vision that you want for your life.
This is what you need to make a priority in your life. Saying "Yes" to yourself and "No" to things that don't light you up will make you a happier, more vibrant version of you.
Do you really want to do it?
Sometimes we feel trapped when someone asks us to do something for them. We don't know how to graciously say "no". And other times we are happy to help out - we don't have any projects we are working on and it is good to give back.
One way to push pause and not over commit is to say " I just need to check what else I have going on.I'll get back to you in a couple of days." Then have a think about all the other commitments you've got going on. This will give you some breathing space to decide if this is a good fit for you.
If it isn't call them back and say " No, this isn't going to work for me."
No excuses. No made up reasons. Just "It doesn't work for me"
Which is why Dana of Creative Yoga and I have pulled out of the Self Love Workshop.
The idea still made our hearts singand we were committed to bringing you a great workshop but it wasn't flowing. Dana has a couple of toddlers that require a lot of time and devotion and a business to run and as any young Mum knows, that's two full time jobs right there.
As for me I am on a deadline to finish my first book as well as creating a program to go alongside it and that is taking way more time than I expected. Plus so many more ideas for projects have been flying at me from all directions so something had to give.
I also feel called to serve a large group of you than just running a workshop in my home town. Women everywhere are looking for ways to nurture and care for themselves now more than ever.
Does this sound like you ?
We are all stressed, over committed and wondering what happened to our dreams?
When is it my turn?
When do I get to look after me?
In amongst all the hats we wear; wife, lover, mother, nurse, employee, business owner, chef, domestic goddess, we have to carve out some space for us.
A space where we can just be; be ourselves, be quiet and still, be our own person free from the demands of others, drop the masks, the names that others call us and be free to express what is inside of us.
If this sounds like you then sign up for my newsletter to keep up to date with all the coming events.