"We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas.... Lalalalalala"
It is that time of year where we hear the Christmas carols blasting forth from every shopping mall and we are all rushing around buying gifts for our loved ones.
Heaven forbid that we forget one of our loved ones! But I bet you do . Every year.
When was the last time that you bought yourself a gift for Christmas? ( Actually, when was the last time that you bought yourself a gift for your birthday? Or just to celebrate you?).
Back in the day, when I was a solo mum with two little boys I would buy my own birthday presents, mothers day gifts and Christmas presents. Hell, I even bought myself regular bunches of flowers because I was worth it.
Even now that I am happily married I still go buy myself gifts and Yes, my husband knows about them!( I buy him gifts too!)
Often we will see posts of the "Top Ten Gifts to give this Christmas" or "Things your partner will love this Christmas" but this post is a little different... it is all about things you can buy or do for yourself. Yup it is all about you, baby. (1) Time
Okay I know you can't buy time. I also know that this time of year we all get a teeny, tiny bit frenetic so what I am suggesting is this... give yourself some time. Block out a chunk of time on your schedule where you take an hour, a day, a weekend, whatever works for you and just chill out. By yourself.
This is a luxury more than any money can buy and one we all deserve to treat ourselves to on a regular basis.
Except we don't.
Instead we say "yes" to another Christmas function that we would rather have our teeth pulled than go to. We say "yes" to spending time with people we don't want to spend time with because "we really must catch up before the end of the year" or family guilt or whatever. So instead I am suggesting that you make an appointment in your diary/day planner/calendar app for you to catch up with you. Then when you are asked if you are available on such and such a day you can reply that you already having something booked then so won't be able to make it.
I like to think of it as a conversation with myself. I discover all sorts of things by asking myself questions and then taking the time to delve deeply into the answers. I have already filled numerous notebooks and aim to fill even more. Yes, I do it by hand. You can do it however you want but there is something visceral about grabbing a book and a pen and sitting down for a few minutes every morning.
Create a ritual around your journaling. Light a candle, burn some incense, grab a hot drink and sit in the same place and then begin to write. Pour it all out on to the page. All of it. All the stuff you have been carrying around in your head. All the things you tell yourself late at night when you can't sleep. all the tings that you dream of. Everything.
What will happen?
You will free yourself up of carrying all this stuff. You will gain new insights and clarity around issues that have been bugging you. Oh, and you will sleep better ( well that's one benefit that has shown up for me)
(3) Jade Egg
Get yourself a jade egg. Jade eggs are used to tone and strengthen your pelvic area but they do much more than that . They reconnect you to your sensual self. They give you permission to engage with your own pleasure and we all need more of that in our lives. Check out Saida Desilets* for more information on the benefits of using a jade egg.
(4) Reconnect to your Inner Goddess
In my forties I declared myself a Sex Goddess and it totally transformed my life. I felt sexier, more confident and more myself than I had for a long time. I gave myself permission to be fully myself without holding back in order to be the "good girl". You can read all about in in my book "The Goddess Guide to Sex, Love and Life" .
When we reclaim ourselves as a Goddess we are tapping into the Divine Feminine energy that we naturally embody and that is our birthright and we heal those parts of us that have been wounded by the current masculine doing-doing-doing, driven system that operates in this world. The Divine Feminine comes from a place of being, stillness and presence. when we connect with this sense of being we can drop back down from our heads into our bodies and tap into our intuition for more guidance and clarity in life.
We are so connected with our smartphones always by our side, beeping and buzzing with incoming texts and notifications. The trouble is it isn't making us any happier or any more connected to the people around us. In fact it is having quite the opposite affect where more and more people are feeling isolated and alone. It just takes a glance around your local coffee shop to see why - people sitting at the same table but glued to their phone instead of interacting with each other.
It is a great idea to designate one day a "switch off" day where you leave your phone off, step away from the computer and just be.